Kai’s story: The amount of pressure you’re under one day will make you shine

Finding Centrepoint support

When Kai was 12 his parents separated and he moved in with his father who was living in temporary accommodation whilst on the waiting list for longer term council housing. However, after Kai moved in, they made an application to change the housing request to a two bedroom home but in doing so, where told that they would then go to the bottom of the list, meaning it would be years before they could move into a home suitable for them both. 

During this time, Kai’s father had been diagnosed with the lung disease COPD and Kai was balancing going to college and being his father’s carer, a huge amount of responsibility for him to manage alone. After five years, despite his father’s health and their living situation, they were still unstably housed with no updates from the council around a more suitable home.

“My parents split when I was 12 and I moved in with my dad around the same time as he was terminally ill with COPD. When I moved in with him, I was his carer. He was in temporary accommodation the whole time. When I moved in, they said that he’ll have to start at the bottom of the list again for a two-bedroom flat”. 

Kai’s father’s health began to decline and sadly he passed away when Kai was a couple of months away from his 18th birthday. As Kai was still legally a child and although his name was not on the property information, the council were unable to move him on and he remained in the home for two months whilst his father’s housing officer looked into the paperwork.

“In the process of waiting, he actually passed and that’s when I technically became homeless because I wasn’t properly on the flat documents but because I was 17, they legally couldn’t kick me out”.

“But within those two months whilst I was waiting, the council were trying to get social services to take me because I was 17, and I was still a kid. They were basically stuck with me for two months until my dad’s housing officer got me on the tenancy for the flat”.

When he turned 18, the council and social services discussed with him his options to move on from the flat. Due to his mental health at the time after losing his father and also his neurodivergence, it was agreed that a shared supported home would not be a suitable option for him.

After some further research and a discussion with him around his support needs, it was decided that Centrepoint’s Independent Living Programme could provide him with the home he needed to thrive.

“The discussion of where to take me on from there started because they initially wanted to put me in a group home, but because of my ADHD and the fact that I could very easily be taken advantage of, it was more of a risk to put me in a group situation – I was very vulnerable. I was already struggling from losing my dad and everything else like that, so the decision was made to put me into an Independent Living Property instead because of my needs”.

Kai was able to move into his new flat quickly and was grateful for the support on hand from his key worker, who could help him settle and get used to his new space.

During this time, however, Kai had to take on care responsibilities for his mum, using his single income to support them both, which at times could be incredibly challenging. As his mother was born in another country, it took Kai over a decade to find all of the right information they needed so that she could access the support she was entitled to. 

“When I was at Centrepoint, my mum was also homeless because she couldn’t prove who she was – she was literally like a ghost in the system. She was born in Australia, and it took a decade for me to get hold of her birth certificate. One of the hardest parts was that mum couldn’t claim any benefits and that led to the burden all being on me”.

He explained some of the situation to his key worker, who was able to support him with food vouchers to help them both and alleviate some of the stress from Kai’s shoulders.

“There were multiple times they helped out with like food shops – sometimes it was an actual voucher and sometimes they brought food round. I can’t stress how much that actually helped, especially in that first year, because I was getting used to living on my own and having one income. It obviously made a big difference.”

To help with the financial stresses, Kai began to look for roles that could be of interest to him and that he could easily step into so he could have a stable income. He hadn't found school the easiest and as he was balancing his home life with trying to pass his exams, he had missed out on some of the qualifications he needed for many career routes. 

He spoke with his key worker who referred him to Centrepoint’s Jobs, Education and Training team to help identify potential roles in the security field and, with the support of the Prince’s Trust, to get the qualifications he needed to move into those roles.

“I’ve had my security badge since I was 19 – the Prince’s Trust helped me to get my badge. And then a few years later I did the CCTV course, which was really helpful. It was one of the deciding factors before I started in retail security because having both badges is a massive advantage.”

He first took a job in retail security but found this was a lot of pressure and stress for the position he was in and soon moved into building security. Being here allowed him the opportunity to progress in his role, due to a change to the site operations, and for the last couple of years he has settled in well to this position, becoming an essential part of his team. 

“I was applying for a bunch of stuff, and they said they would put me in a role and then that led me to get in this role to what I’m doing now. I was a security offer and then I got lucky that after a year there was a massive change up on site. There was a new building opening up and that opened me up to be able to get this current role”.

Centrepoint’s Lived Experience Advisory Board

Centrepoint’s Lived Experience Advisory Board (LEAB) is a panel of young people, supported through Centrepoint in a variety of ways, who work collaboratively with different teams to ensure that decision making is based in the lives of those who have experienced homelessness. 

Kai joined the group in May 2025, and soon began to feel the benefit of being part of a collective where each individual, although they might have had vastly different experiences to you, can understand who you are.

“I think one of the best bits is actually being in a group that understands you”.

Despite working full-time, Kai has thrown himself into different opportunities such as speaking at Centrepoint's Sleep Out event, at conferences with corporate partners and getting involved with different projects with a range of teams. He didn’t expect to gain as much from the group as he did, not only getting experience of being included in those settings, but also the invaluable friendships he has been able to develop.

“It’s surprising how much I’ve actually gained from it. I’ve learned about different perspectives, and I’ve been able to share mine. I’ve made friends outside of this and that’s always nice”.

Reflecting on his experiences

At 26, Kai was able to move into his own council home, where he has been settling in well for the past few years. He felt frustrated by the continued lack of support from the council to help him move on, which meant that he had to wait years before he was prioritised for support.

“I think I left when I turned 26 because the council took so long to get me my own place because they weren’t prioritising me. But in December 2023 they moved me into my own actual property.”

He thinks back towards his expectations of what he thought Centrepoint would look and feel like, and how when he first moved in, as he had experienced such a huge loss and was in the grieving process, he didn’t know at all what it might look or feel like.

“I didn’t have any expectations around what it would be like – I was 18 and still heavily grieving my dad and had recently gotten out of a relationship”. 

However, he can now see that through the Independent Living Programme, he was able to develop his skills around supporting himself long-term and it gave him the space he needed to grow into who he is now. He credits the programme with helping him take those steps and giving him the opportunity to learn in an environment where there was support on hand, if he needed it.

“Independent Living got me to being independent. I learned how to live because when I was living with Dad, he still did a lot and of cooking to be fair. So compared to living independently, I learned what I needed to do anything. I wasn’t coddled by my dad in any way, but I didn’t have to do as much as what I should have had to on my own”.

He recognises how challenging the past decade has been for him, with the loss of his father, supporting his mother and starting to live fully independently. However, he also credits what he calls his PMA ‘positive mental attitude’ on helping him through each situation – helping to change his perspective and keep him going through some of the most challenging experiences.

“It’s not been easy but at the end of the day, I see it as the situation that I’ve been dealt, and I have to deal with it. What else can I actually do? I can’t give up on the situation”.

After supporting his mother to get her documentation which has allowed her to access support, it has also meant that Kai could also apply for a passport, something he didn't have until 2025. He’s taken up every opportunity so far to book trips and see the world – already visiting Germany as a Pokémon Go hotspot and taking his partner and him away for a visit to Disneyland Paris (having already planned their return visit for this year!). 

He recognises that over the last couple of years things have changed a lot for him and are beginning to slot into place. Although not everything is exactly where he wants it to be, he feels having his passport and joining the LEAB has supported him in ways he didn’t expect.

“I look back to like the last 2-3 years and dare I say, I’m a lot happier. Things have changed in my life quite a bit – I can go abroad now and having a passport is definitely something that people take for granted”.

Having this distance and being able to take steps forward in his life, has meant that he can reflect on where he is and what he might want to gain from the future. Looking at his situation, he feels content where he is and with the trajectory he is on, especially now he has his passport, and the world is more open to him.

“I’ve always been the kind of guy who has accepted where I am in life. I’m not one day going to be a millionaire and famous and that sort of thing – I’m pretty content with what I’ve got. You know more holidays and more stuff like that, but this is probably about my level”.

For Kai, he’s been able to look over his own experiences and see what guiding forces were able to help him take steps forward and reach where he is now. He recognises that similar to how diamonds are made, under intense pressure, that he too has been able to become something new.

“Keep pushing forward – I mean I look back at everything that’s happened from when I was little to now and I just kept pushing forward. I’ve not let it drag me down too much. One of my favourite sayings is pressure makes diamonds. The fact is, that the amount of pressure you’re under one day will make you shine.”

We are so immensely proud of everything that Kai has been able to achieve and his unwavering strength and determination to move forwards in his life. We can’t wait to see what he does next and look forward to hearing more about his travels around the world.